Our 4-year-old son and 2-year-old son were playing in the sandbox. The 4-year old was in a slightly agitated mood, trying to control all the toys and dominate his brother to play certain games. The younger one took a small yellow plastic car shortly after his brother had finished playing with it. The sandbox had 4-5 other vehicles in it, so there was no shortage of toys.
Our older son tore it out of his brother’s hands and said that he was playing with it.
I gently took it back and gave it to the younger, saying that he would get it back as soon as his brother was done.
Our older son asked his brother if he was done, and he said “No”.
This brought on a barrage of screaming and yelling, followed by kicking and crying, while the older one was adamant about having THAT toy. I sat with him, held him kindly but firmly, repeated that he would get it as soon as his brother was done and that I would sit with him and wait.
He kept yelling, kicking (away from me) and crying for a couple of minutes. Then his little brother came over and gave him the yellow car. Our older son loudly stated that he didn’t want it and proceeded to play with something else!
I am not sure if he got all the hurt out, but he was in a much better mood after the crying and had no interest in taking toys from his brother.
– a parenting by connection mom