It’s funny how a little Special Time with your child can do wonders for both you and your child.
One afternoon when I was feeling somewhat low-key with many pressing issues on my mind, my then 10-year-old preteen daughter asked me for some Special Time. She wanted to wrestle with me. I wasn’t quite ready to get out of my shell, but I went ahead and wrestled with her anyway. She was terrific. We both had a great time wrestling, in which she invariably got me down on the floor and reigned supreme!
After the wrestling, she decided that I was a bouncing machine and she bounced on top of me. And then I was a rolling machine and she rolled on top of me. She was a strong kid and it was hard to deal with the sheer physical force of it all. But I was not fazed. It was so much fun. We laughed and laughed and laughed, literally rolling on the floor. I was definitely out of my shell very soon and she too had a great time connecting with me. We felt very close.
I had a pile of chores to do that afternoon: laundry and dog-poop-scooping! For the first time ever, my daughter came with me to the backyard to help me clean up the poop. Prior to this, her strong sense of smell had always come in the way of helping with this particular chore. But this time, she was able to overcome her distaste enough to help me do it! And right after that, she helped with all the laundry and we folded a lot of clothes together.
There was no question that the special time and laughter we had together had created a warm and connected space for her. So much cooperation with so much fun and no nagging! And I loved the double-bonus – it lifted my spirits too!
—Certified Parenting by Connection Instructor Usha Sangam
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You can learn more about Parenting by Connection in the Listening to Children booklet set.